The police in your area would like to inform everyone that no arrests has been made yet, they are still investigating. This… they said concerning the crime that you reported and concerning every other case that everyone else reported at the police station , “No arrests have been made yet, we are still investigating”, they said in a brief statement on Thursday morning.

 

The police would also like you to know that even the suspect that was arrested on your case will be released because there is not enough evidence, “There is not enough evidence linking the suspect to the crime, even though he was caught red handed committing the crime. There is not enough evidence, we have no choice but to let the suspect go.”, they said.

Last but not least, the police would like to inform you that they will not be able to come to the crime scene urgently when you call them to report a crime in progress,” This is because we are under resourced, under staffed and most of the time under the influence of alcohol. We apologize for the inconvenience.”, the police in your area said in their conclusion.

*Satire

 

 

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